


Friendship Over Diamonds

by krispykoo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Crackhead energy, Hinata Shouyou & Kageyama Tobio Friendship, Hinata Shouyou is Sunshine, Kageyama Tobio is Bad at Feelings, M/M, One Shot, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:27:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27575183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/krispykoo/pseuds/krispykoo
Summary: Maybe it was the red blaring lights blinking above him, he thought. Or possibly it was the fact he was about to spend ten or twenty years locked in prison. Or maybe, just maybe it was the annoying little orange haired shit crying in front of him. Either way, it didn’t matter. The massive headache he had could only justify one action. He was going to fucking murder Hinata by beating the shit out of him.— or —Hinata and Kageyama attempt to rob a bank.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	Friendship Over Diamonds

“Repeat the plan to me, dipshit.” Kageyama couldn’t possibly think of a single reason as to why his partner in crime was him— as in the most annoying person he has ever met. Despite their success in highschool, life is a real bitch who doesn’t take kindly to those with aspiring dreams. Dreams like becoming professional volleyball players. _As if,_ he thought. Broke friends like Hinata and him were bound for homelessness at some point, and their stubborn asses would never properly exceed at even a part time job. And that’s why they’re standing behind a bank at the dead of midnight, sweating profusely under masks that only revealed their eyeballs.

“C’mon Kageyama! I got this down, this is already the fifth time I’ve had to repeat it!” Hinata cried and tugged at Kageyama’s arm. Kageyama angrily whipped his arm away from his grasp and gave him a harsh shove.

“It’s because you’re an absolute dumbass who would one hundred percent mess shit up! Remember when I had to bail your ass out of jail for trespassing because you refused to listen to my directions at the time?”

“That was just one timeee!” Hinata continued to whine as he fell backwards and kicked his legs into the air. Kageyama scoffed.

“It was not ‘just one time’ idiot. There were countless times! Like that time you-”

“Okay I get it! Sheesh!” Hinata let out a big sigh as he continued, “First I have to listen to your every direction, and then when we get in the building I'm not allowed to talk at all. Then..”

—

Hinata finished repeating the plan for the tenth time and Kageyama finally felt a little bit more reassured, but not alot. He sighed as he got up from his spot and made his way to the blue dumpster can that sat right under a sealed tight window. Suddenly, Hinata shoved past him while gripping a screwdriver and began climbing on top of the trash can.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Kageyama stared at him in disbelief. Hinata flinched and warily turned around.

“Uhmm.. Just handing you the screw driver?” Hinata half smiled and awkwardly held the tool out with his other hand placed behind his head. Kageyama swiped it away from him and gave him a warning glare. Hinata backed down.

Once Kageyama successfully unscrewed the bolts that held the tiny window in place, he carefully removed it and set it aside.

“Why is there a random window here anyways?” Hinata began to bark beside him. Kageyama narrowed his eyes at him. (He should’ve been expecting this, but it still pissed him off that Hinata forgets everything he’s been told not to do.)

“How the fuck am I suppose to know? Why don’t you just ask the wall if you’re that fucking curious. ‘Hey wall! I’m a dumbass and I’m wondering why a window is here!’” Kageyama mocked him while opting for an eye roll.

“Oh shut up! You’re always so grouchy.” Hinata pouted next to him as they crept towards the window. Kageyama realizes he’s a big asshole most of the time he’s with Hinata, and maybe that’s a bad thing. He can’t help it though, Hinata is the literal definition of a headache.

“Anyways, I’m going to go inside first so don’t come in until I tell yo-- Hey! Dumbass, quit shoving!” Hinata pushed Kageyama to the side and hopped down with a large thump. He glared up at him and turned to speed away. Kageyama angrily climbed in after him, immediately running towards him.

“What the fuck are you doing! Are you crazy?!” He harshly whispered while grabbing Hinata’s mask from behind, hard enough to rip it off his head.

Hinata whips around, his face red with a mixture of anger and embarrassment. He looked about ready to cry, maybe. Seeing this made Kageyama feel kind of bad, but he still was overwhelmed with rage.

“Oh bad word this and bad word that! You know what? I can do this without you, shittyama!” Hinata yelled. He then proceeded to pull out something from his side, something so surprising it even made Kageyama gasp.

“H-hey what are you--” Kageyama’s eyes widened as Hinata raised his gun at him, hands shaky. He was definitely going to beat his ass later. Not just that actually; he’ll forcefully feed him spicy food with no milk or water too.

“Psh, what are you? _Scared_?” Hinata laughed, but his voice was clearly shaking. If anything, he was the one scared. Kageyama sighed. _This kid knows he’s going to eat his own shit later._

Kageyama gained his consciousness again and started stomping towards Hinata. “ **Give** me that.” The other yelped as he gripped his wrists, but Hinata just profusely shook his head.

“No! Stupid Kageyama, I won’t! Let go!” Hinata tried ripping himself away by ducking below Kageyama’s arms. He pushed his arms out towards the taller boy's face, making Kageyama’s mask fall off in the process. This just caused Kageyama to groan in annoyance and wrap his arm around his neck.

“Dumbass! Just give me the fucking gun before I force it off of you!” Hinata just struggled against him; during this struggle he began to lose his breath. “Ka-- gg-- yaa..”

Then, a loud and intrusive noise echoed in the hall they were in. They both stilled, their breathing stopped as well. Kageyama glanced at Hinata who had gone purple, looking down. He followed his gaze.

“Oi.” Kageyama steadily said, staring at his foot. The floor around it began to paint red with blood. “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

Hinata cried as he tried to run away, but Kageyama had a death grip on him. A string of apologies started flooding out from the small boy, but the pain in Kageyama’s right foot made him burn with intensive rage. As he was about to land a punch on the red head--

“Hey! Who’s there?” A bright light flashed towards the corner they were hidden behind. Both staring with wide eyes, Hinata began to grip Kageyama's shirt and silently panic. He tried to shake the annoying orange head off, but was struck with his own panic as well.

“Kag-- Kageyama!! They’re coming, what do we do? We’re gonna die, we’re gonna die, we’re gonna die-- Mmmghsh!?” Hinata’s panic whispers were halted by Kageyama’s hand as he harshly hushed him. The light began to grow in size and illuminate more of the area they were in. The person was about to turn the corner and Kageyama silently wished he had a jug of bleach he could drink right now. He loosened his grip on Hinata in defeat since he wasn’t in any condition to run. Hinata then took the chance to shake free and be an absolute fucking idiot.

“Th-this.. THIS IS A ROBBERY! WE’RE ARMED!!” He screamed and the person halted, followed by hurried footsteps running in the opposite direction. _Now he’s gone and done it,_ Kageyama thought to himself. _We’re going to get arrested, and it’s all thanks to this shitwad_.

The very next second, alarms rang throughout the building with intensively bright red lights. Hinata looked around in panic and began to spew out senseless words, most of which were asking Kageyama what to do. He was too drained to think of a plan, however. (With the amount of brainless energy he had to deal with tonight, he was about ready to just pass away.)

“I thought you said you could do this without me.” Kageyama bratted at him and sat his ass on the ground. Hinata sobbed even hard towards him.

“I’m swroryy! This isn’t the time, w-we need to..” Kageyama drowned the rest of his jumbled rant out of his head.

Maybe it was the red blaring lights blinking above him, he thought. Or possibly it was the fact he was about to spend ten or twenty years locked in prison. Or maybe, just maybe it was the annoying little orange haired shit crying in front of him. Either way, it didn’t matter. The massive headache he had could only justice one action. He was going to fucking murder Hinata by beating the shit out of him.

Sirens of cop cars began to pull alarmingly close to the building they were stuck in. That subsequently sealed their fate. They could hear the booming voices of the police officers as they entered the building. _This is it, goodbye freedom. Hello prison food--_

“Kageyama! Please snap out of it! If we go to prison, we won’t be able to see each other!!” Hinata cried in front of him, his hands gripping Kageyama’s shoulders. The ravenhead widened his eyes towards him. _That’s what he’s worried about right now?_ He could’ve pondered this longer, but he came up with a sudden plan.

Kageyama grabbed Hinata’s neck as the smaller one gasped in confusion; proceeding to grab the gun next to him, Kageyama pointed it towards the other's head. Hinata began to panic as questions spewed from his mouth.

“Just shut up, idiot!” Kageyama whispered, forcing Hinata to walk forward towards the officers making their way down the hall. “I have a hostage! Back up or i’ll shoot him!” Walking had awakened the pain that was throbbing in his foot. He tried to hide the shake in his voice from this sudden realization. He saw the officers halt in their tracks by the stillness of the flashlights that illuminated from the other end of the hall.

Kageyama knew he shouldn’t reveal their faces, especially since they luckily have been in a blindspot of the cameras up until this point. _We could still escape_. Kageyama then turned to Hinata who was still tearing up and shaking in panic. He grabbed the top of his head to turn his gaze towards him. “Listen to me carefully. When I say go, we’re going to sprint as fast as we can to the place where we entered from. Nothing else matters right now. Just _do as I say._ ” All Hinata could do is nod as he preps himself to sprint with Kageyama’s arm wrapped around his shoulders for support.

“Go!” Kageyama whispered as they sprint as fast as they could towards their exit. He grit his teeth, enduring the fire of pain spreading up his leg. He just imagined the satisfying amount of food he’ll force Hinata to buy him to help him cope through these moments. They reached the window, the redhead climbing up first and sticking his hand out for Kageyama.

They were able to exit the bank but just around the corner were countless police lights that surrounded the front of the bank. The pair had managed to escape from the back and blend in with a crowd of people. Far enough from the crime scene, they both plopped down onto a nearby bench and sigh in relief.

“I can’t believe we just did that!” Hinata burrowed his head into his hands. Kageyama punched his arm, and then repeated it. The other boy had put his arms up in defense. “I know you're mad okay! I get it, you don’t have to make me feel worse!! But maybe if you didn’t have such a shitty attitude towards me I wouldn’t have acted up.” Hinata resented. The other halted their assault and slumped back.

“I know.” Hinata just stared at him in confusion. Glancing to the side, Kageyama sighed and stood up. “After you pay for my hospital bill, I’ll go job hunting-- we’ll go actually, together.” Kageyama corrected himself. Despite him still being pissed about the situation that had just happened, hitting Hinata won’t fix his problems. He’s tried that before. They might as well try getting their life together if they’ve stooped this low. Besides, the way Hinata is beaming up at him right now is kind of cute.

**Author's Note:**

> I always wondered how these two would be as criminals... Of course, their antics would completely blow their cover every time :,) But they’re precious!


End file.
